DuckyBlender/PeterExplainsTheJoke · Datasets at Hugging Face

image imagewidth (px) 252 4.32k	prompt stringlengths 1 162	top_comment stringlengths 5 3.95k
	Petah Parkuh , help	People expect anti-depressants to make them happy, but often what happens is the person feels no strong emotions at all. Or at least it seems that way after you've been having powerful mood swings for years. Depends on the underlying condition and the drugs used, but I've often heard it described as a "flattening" effect.
	Friend sent me this immediately after I told him I was colorblind. All I see are dots. Petaaaah?	It doesn’t say anything don’t worry about it.
	Can someone explain this	[deleted]
	Petah, what's wrong here?	That is a comedian. She has a series where she interviews people who are real-life experts, and asks the most ridiculously stupid questions. The character’s name is Philemena Cunk, I think.you should search YouTube for some videos of hers. It is a joke about how everyone in the cabinet has been the worst-possible choice for their positions in the US.
	Peter help	Phthalo green if anyone is looking
	Petah?	The fade and an actually groomed beard are regarded as the type of hairstyles used by Caucasian males to indicate they would like to have relations with women of African descent.
	Petah??	Patients who are within minutes or hours of dying often feel much better and become lucid. Family members often see this as promising, but someone around so much death knows what's coming.
	I feel weird not getting this	I can't stand a lil dick no car no house no money clown ass gay ass fuck n****
	??	I'm guessing they are young computer nerds and she is a hot girl. So a little flirting with them might convince them to give her sensitive info about the company. In the most extreme case passwords to infiltrate the whole computer system and take over the company ( given this is a joke).
	Petah	Peter's left sock here. As a general rule, if someone has one crazy ex, the ex was probably crazy. If they describe every single ex as crazy, they are probably the one that's crazy. The doge in the middle is proud to be the first "nice guy" she's ever dated, but the one's around him know he's doomed to become another crazy ex, because the problem in all his new girlfriends past relationships was probably her. They know they can't do anything about it, because he has to learn for himself. Hope this helps, Peter's left sock out!
	what’s the context?	Those prefixes are Latin for the aforementioned numbers 7-10, which were, in fact, those numbered months once. It was changed in the Julian calendar, by Julius Caesar who pretty famously got stabbed. Like a bunch.
	Disney+?	So a woman died on Disney property after eating a dinner that she was assured was allergen free. Her husband sued. Disney said that when he signed up for a free one month trial of D plus he agreed to arbitration and couldn't sue.
	How did they lose their career?	Because Eminem writes the most brutal, career ending disses against everyone who does
	Let's see you explain this one Peter	They did shitposting back in 4500-1900BC
	Petah…	The United Health Care CEO shooter was recently apprehended in Pennsylvania in a McDonald’s after a tip was called in by another customer, contrary to the current belief that it was an employee. The meme is implying that the McDonald’s worker would also snitch on Anne Frank, who was hiding in an attic from the Nazis, because of the belief a McDonald’s employee snitched
	Huh?	Is it imperative that the cylinder stays unharmed?? If not you could just hammer it to break the plastic
	Petre, why the two broken nails?	Trimmed for fingering safely
	?	Drywall vs WALL🧱
	Married zoomer here, what are we doing wrong?	Speaking as a millennial who is single, I feel like the guy on the ground watching that chopper fly off into the sunset. Dating apps are poison for anyone who isn't conventionally attractive, even if they do lead to relationships occasionally (I have a friend who met their spouse on there but they're both ridiculously attractive people inside and out) they're built with the intention of keeping people on the apps. That's not going to happen if they're good at pairing people off into relationships. Add in a chronically online culture exacerbated by Covid lockdowns and a cost of living crisis pushing up the price of going out for a few drinks and you have a population of people who hardly ever go out so are less likely to meet organically and less able to interact with people in a flirty way. And I include myself in this.
	Help.	Roman Petrus here. The show being referenced is the mockumentary Cunk on Earth, where the titular narrator humorously misinterprets history. The Romans left a lot from their history, including pottery fragments (which broke due to the long time period), which Cunk humorously says is caused by their clumsiness.
	⁉️	Canadians have legal euthanasia Britols need to wait before getting medicine Amercanus have to pay
	Peter? What???	Kenneth D. Pinyin was a Boeing engineer who lived in Washington state and repeatedly filmed himself performing sex acts on horses, until he [ruptured his colon while taking a horse dick up his ass and died](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enumclaw_horse_sex_case)
	Excuse me?	There was a clip of him and P Diddy from years ago. So likely he was a member of those freak out parties that everyone including Homeland Security is concerned about leading people to think he was groomed by him, or worse.
	Help me peter	https://i.redd.it/w0di7ks0a2te1.gif It's a scene from breaking bad, where walter white(dad) throws pizza on the house
	Peter, what's going on in serbia?	A new sonic weapon was unveiled in Serbia against protestors. So, the problem is that it is going to be a new "non-lethal" weapon. Non-lethal weapons have the problem of making people at home feel okay about it while causing severe problems to people it's used on. Sonic weapons and stun grenades absolutely fucking deafen you and pierce your eardrums. Rubber bullets will still break bones, and can totally kill you, they're just less likely to kill you. Tear gas causes severe respiratory distress. As a guy whose seen stun grenades used, I'd kinda prefer if they just fired over protestors' heads or something. My ears haven't stopped ringing since I was 13. I can't sleep without a cocktail of medicine. Sonic weapons, as far as I know, can't be defended against deafening you by wearing earpro. The equivalent amount of sound is multiple .45 ACP rounds going off *inside of you,* radiating throughout your body.
	Petah?	Autistic people have safe foods that are comforting. A lot of those are things that we grew up eating. That makes the foods familiar and therefore "safe".
	petaah...	Nurses keep the death count low but the body count high
	Petah… I don’t get it	Engineers are paid for efficient and low cost solutions while architects are paid to (in the best of cases but not all) make structures that look good and serve their purpose often increasing the price of and decreasing the efficiency of construction. In this image the engineers solution is practical and efficient while the architects is better looking but is less practical. This is a generalization to better answer the joke Edit: this comment ignores the fact that architects and engineers often work hand in hand using both of their strengths. Practical doesn’t always mean beautiful, and we do benefit from beauty around us.
	Eh?	Civics Peter here -- some people make their own paths. The city at first is adding things to the park to try and discourage people from cutting across from the corner, but it doesn't work. Then, they give in and put in a path reflecting what people were doing originally. People still cut the (new) corner, because people are like that.
	Petah	It’s a scene from The Mist. Towards the end of the film, the man pictured is held up in a car with a number of others, including his son. Believing that soon they’ll all die, he kills them all, but doesn’t have a bullet for himself. After killing them, the mist begins to clear and the military starts driving through. The tragedy is that if he had waited just a few more moments, he wouldn’t have had to kill his son. Now he has to live with it for the rest of his life.
	peter help	In There Will Be Blood, the character of Daniel Plainview, a cruel and ruthless oil baron uses people around him to appear to be a sympathetic and trustworthy person. At times it was his brother until he outgrew his usefulness. For much of the movie it’s his adopted son who he only adopts because he sees the son as having a business advantage. Everything Daniel does is targeted and aimed at his business ventures, regardless of the human cost. Edit:spelling Also- many people disagree with my analysis being too simplistic. Guys, it’s just a meme. Edit 2: As now this is my top voted comment probably of all time over like 5 usernames, I’m just going to go ahead and make another statement that guys, it’s just a simplistic joke that Musk is using children to appear less sociopathic. The nuances of Daniel’s character are far more interesting that Musk’s, who was simply born rich and for his entire life has put up a charade of acting scrappy and entrepreneurial while the whole time simply being a billionaire playboy who clearly never has done any hard work. His doughy physique is a metaphor for the rest of him, he just isn’t a very dedicated, smart or disciplined person however is quick to throw a buck down to make himself appear more attractive with a hair transplant, or smarter by buying a motor company with smart engineers. So look, I’ve turned off replies, I really don’t care anymore, at least you could say there was a time when Daniel had a scrappy determination to become wealthy and made personal risks to his life and put in hard work. The film has a narrative of him with a duality of still thinking he’s the man at the bottom of the mine despite being on top of an oil company, far removed from the labor…. It’s just one of the many intricacies of the character they set up.
	Petah	This guy made [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/zdv5gv/how_would_you_get_a_small_cylinder_51in_length/) on /r/askreddit. He was asking how to get a "cylinder" unstuck from a Mini M&Ms tube. The commenters realized it was his dick and ran with it, despite him repeatedly exclaiming "It's a cylinder" as if that makes it not his dick.
	Help me out here	I’m guessing all they are assembling a team of billionaire “assassins” as these are all things that took billionaires out. Tbh idk someone let me know
	petah what's the joke	There is a trend of women switching roles and saying phrases a male might say to a female: “I would’ve been in the NFL if it wasn’t for my career ending knee injury”.
	Petuh?	I think this is a reference to the idea that AI can act in unpredictably (and perhaps dangerously) efficient ways. An example I heard once was if we were to ask AI to solve climate change and it proposes killing all humans. That’s hyperbolic, but you get the idea.
	What did I miss in history class?	Some people defending Elon’s gesture at the inauguration claimed it was a Roman salute. Now people are mad at Elon and vandalizing Teslas, seemingly owned by random people, and this meme is jokingly making the same dumb excuse.
	Pea tuh! I don't get it	Pete Davidson boned Kim Kardashian after she dumped Kanye. Pete is apparently a preferred bounce back lay for a lot of famous women because he's got mental health issues that make him not seek commitment to go along with his rumored to be huge dick. So if Bianca also boinked him, it would be funny in a sad kind of way.
	Im so lost.	American soldier impregnated Vietnamese lady and left.
	Peter please help	Bras for larger breasts are harder to open
	Someone help me out.	The first bottle had cocaine in it.
	What	The theory is that humans' hunting strategy was not to be faster or bigger than prey but just to have more stamina. So we caught our food by tiring it out, we're physically not fast or strong enough to do it any other way.
	What does the number mean?	256 is 2^(8) and the fact computer use bits (0 or 1, so 2 numbers) and bytes (8 bits) is pretty basic computer knowledge. One byte can represent 256 numbers, usually 0-255. Writing tech articles without knowing that indicates they're writing on a topic they don't understand even the basics of.
	What?	Catholics are supposed to give up eating meat on Fridays in lent. But fish is free game. In one region of the world a type of larg rodent, I believe its called a nutria was over populated and running rampant, so the local catholic population asked permission to eat them on fridays in lent. and the bishops were like "Ehhhh sure, well just say its a fish." And thus the nutria became a fish. Edit: I have now been told probably around 100 times that the picture is in fact a capybara, not a nutria.
	I dont get it.	Wives/Girlfriends always want you to give an estimate of when you will be home from things, even if there is absolutely no way of knowing when that will be (i.e. a battle)
	Pole vaulter?	https://preview.redd.it/…ole hard enough.
	Peter I need help	Men for men for bear. Plate is basically saying gay men looking for a large manly man
	I’m not sure about this one, Peter-san.	It’s a meme that women find men unattractive if they display any emotion, especially negative emotions like fear or sadness
	Petah what did i miss?	The only upside to that debate is that people suddenly got a wake-up call as to why old out of touch people shouldn't be leading the country. Sadly, I expect most people will just hit the snooze button.
	Peter? Why should they mine bitcoin?	Mining bitcoin takes a lot of electricity.
	Petah, what's wrong with the cow?	Farmhand Peter here. You do not get between a mother and her calf, she will royally fuck you up.
	Peter?	Napoleon is too freaky, he like that shit musty
	What does the bottom image mean?	To Kill a Mockingbird Story: In 1932 Alabama, a widowed lawyer with two small children defends a black man accused of raping a white woman.
	Please explain!	He’s surprised that Sheldon, a nerd, has a girlfriend. The girlfriend was excited to meet him. The fact that she knew who he was, shows she’s a nerd too, which is why it makes sense that Sheldon got a girlfriend. Edit: He is “Professor Proton” who was a former children’s science show host on Big Bang Theory.
	I ain’t catholic, Pete.	The comic is saying that atheists behave in accordance with Jesus' teachings despite their lack of faith in religion or God while Christian Nationalists, whose beliefs and identity are fiercely Christian, act for the benefit of capitalism and directly contradict those same teachings. The point of it is to show the irony that atheists behave as a good Christian should while those seeking to build a Christian society do the opposite.
	What does this mean Peter	Pocahontas was def inspired by psychedelics.
	I don't get it petahh	There's no shame in scientists owning up to the fact that their mathematical model of the universe doesn't match reality. They made a bunch of observations that indicate their current models are incorrect. They add placeholder 'dark' factors to the equations to reflect this observed innacuracy. And then they get to work figuring out what the heck the true model of the universe is. That's science baby.
	Petah?	The backrooms are a fictional location of infinite rooms that you supposedly access by glitching yourself or being glitched out of reality. The rooms are liminal spaces, spaces that are eerily empty and are portrayed with featureless carpets, white walls, and older fluorescent lighting. If there is something inside of a backroom that seems innocent, like a soda machine, chances are it's some kind of eldrich horror trying to lure you in. More than likely, it's not a coincidence our thirsty protagonist ran into a pepsi machine.
	Pete??	Lily Phillips is a pornstar who wants to fuck 1,000 dudes in one day.
	Saw this on twitter, what does it mean?	Guy at the bottom is flipping incredible at looking at an image and being able to pinpoint where it is on the globe with unerring accuracy. Cousin giving smouldering look sounds like Alabama. So guy identifies picture was taken in Alabama.
	Comments weren't helpful	My guess is all the LED lights that gen Z’s like to have in their rooms
	Muslim peter, i need help	You’re not “allowed” to depict the prophet, so there are no statues
	I don't get it, can someone explain?	he wants to shape the world according to his own liking.
	Petahh what did steam do?	https://preview.redd.it/…25ff99ab9ebc39a0
	Petah?	https://preview.redd.it/…2e0f74f593940ca5
	Peteros, what happened on Instagram on February 26th?	instas algorithm yesterday suddenly started showing straight up gore, plus nsfw stuff like videos of child birthing. and it seemed like everyone was getting it, there was also A LOT of fight videos more than normal. to say the least it wasnt fun scrolling reels yesterday. idk why it happened but i heard some of the people that filtered content in meta left and it was left for ai Edit: forgot to mention all the reels about deep sea fish apearing on shores, a lot of people seemed to get that aswell
	Petah, Please Help	Be ready to be manipulated, stomped on and heart broken. Or as you know. Wednesday
	Help Peter	There is no snow on that roof because it is significantly warmer than the neighbouring houses. The joke is that in 2018, the most likely explanation is someone growing weed under hot, hot grow lamps. In 2020, it's more likely to be someone running 100s of video cards to mine Bitcoin or similar (also very hot). But in 2022, power prices are so fucking high, only a lottery winner could afford to have a house that warm.
	What am i looking at?	A succulent Chinese meal
	Peter?	I’m a high school teacher who has this meme framed on my desk. I don’t tell the students but it’s actually for me and not for them.
	Petah, what’s going on?	Topology(hole science) joke. Socks, by topological standarts, have no holes.
	PETAH!?!?	When a horse breaks it's leg, it almost never heals properly, and they are often put down to save them a life of pain and repeat broken bones. The comic is ~~paralleging~~ paralleling a paper cut to a broken leg. RIP Eddie.
	What happens in the nail salon petah?	Nail artists are usually foreigners that talk about customers in their mother language so they can speak badly about customers in their faces (stereotypes)
	Peter, I'm so lost	After being in that chamber for a while you'll start having hallucinations. That commenter thinks that will make things much more fun.
	Petah???	Disclaimer: I am a big dumb ignoramus about guns. There is a meme that one can convert an AR-15 (civilian, semi-automatic) into an automatic weapon using a cost hanger. Kermit has one on his back in the meme. I tried to look up a video to see if it's more than just a meme, and now I'm probably on a list.
	Petahhh what's he holding??	Dude has the remote control for a pleasure device worn by woman who is overcome with sensation and leaning on the wall. Choose Your Adventure, episode 37 But when I pleasure myself in public, I am asked to pull up my pants and... 1. leave the petting zoo 2. return my shopping cart to the corral 3. exit the funeral home as quietly as possible
	I don’t get it. Help me Patah	That is Johnny Sins. He was a pornstar that would play characters from numerous professions. One of my favorites is where A random Twitter user tricked the Minnesota Vikings into displaying him on the big screen during Salute to Service. https://preview.redd.it/j0gedi5bpn3e1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dbca83af8170ad1c6f634f53b90e7a424c95c480
	Peter, what's this about "making sense"?	My guess is, person has a dysfunctional, toxic family and thought that such a thing was normal, until they met girlfriend's parents and learned what a healthy family actually looks like
	I don’t get it?	Brian here. They're saying the grandchild of these legendary people is probably such an amazing person, they may as well be the messiah. And no, I'm not the messiah. Wrong Brian.
	Peter?	Alt/Goth girls are commonly referred to as “girls who will ruin your life”.
	Peter, what did I miss?	Senator Mark Kelly, a possible pick for Kamala Harris to announce as her running mate and potential future Vice President, is a former astronaut who spent a total of 54 days in space. JD Vance, Donald Trump’s current running mate and potential future vice president, is currently the subject of a false social media claim/joke that he wrote in his memoir that he fucked a couch once. Whatever his flaws as a person, writing this in his memoir does not appear to be one of them.
	Petah?	It's about the whole alpha, beta, delta, sigma bs that some men obsesse over it.
	Peter? I’ve seen this several times but still don’t understand.	At Starbucks the sizes for drinks are not “small, medium, large.” They’re tall, grande, venti, trenta (smallest to largest). Dude was up next to order and didn’t know how to say he wanted the equivalent of a “small” drink. Starbucks baristas will typically correct you or verify the size with the correct terminology if you try to order a “small.”
	Need some help for this one	Twitter Brian here If I had to make an educated guess I’m assuming that “The Sheep and the Wolf” is an analogy for politics, as the mother’s thousand yard stare implies something that the child isn’t aware of — even though the child is situationally aware/smart enough to question the realism of the stories logistics. “Everybody knows I don’t eat sheep, in fact I eat way less sheep than anybody” as he chomps down on a sheep — politicians will claim things with pure intentions while their gross actions prove otherwise — “sheep” is a commonly used word to describe naive followers, often used by conspiracy theorists to describe people who will believe anything that the media/politicians say. The third panel shows this naivety, as the sheep confidently says the sheep-eating wolf will protect them from sheep eaters. In the final panel, the daughter is incredibly skeptical, like “oh come on, nobody is that dumb”, whereas the mother knows that there are people who are that dumb Edited for mobile formatting
	I’m stumped	The one on the top right killed his son’s rapist. Searched up Gary Plauché.
	Peter? I don't have a dog	The joke is just that the dog is getting ready to run away very fast. If they do this run away instead of towards them, they will instinctively start chasing you instead of fleeing from you, making it much easier to catch them.
	Do they hate it that much?	Only 3% of Latinos view the term Latinx positively. It is largely an insult to their language and by proxy, their culture.
	Peter????	See now a redditor not getting this one i get
	Why is he sweating?	Well, my wife went to get the car checked alone, we spend a lot on small repairs, that i had checked by a mechanic i trust and all of them where either unessecary or he wasnt sure they even did it I drive in there alone with my rustbucket and they go, naah, part is still fine, heres your TÜV.
	Peter?	trump
	Petahhh….	https://preview.redd.it/…riginal incident
	Why?	I’m guessing they don’t want giant, floppy horse cocks on screen for some crazy reason.
	I feel like this is going to be really bad peter	Peter's Dark Arts Teacher here. JK Rowling is infamous for making some rather on-the-nose names, like naming a werewolf "Lupin" which means wolf.
	What's wrong with chocolate peter	A lot of chocolate is produced by child slave labor with major suppliers often claiming to be "shocked" whenever it gets uncovered but really it's just expensive and moderately difficult to fully root out so they just don't really try that hard. The meme is mocking vegans for going out of their way to protect bees while not being too worried about human slaves
	Petah, what's the reason behind this sign?	iirc, the girl was shadow's friend and her death was important for shadows origin and people cheered because he truly became "shadow the hedgehog" and got a motive when she died. sorry, english is not my first language
	Petah I'm not from the US	Basically the setting of FarCry 5
	Peter?	I see my parents fighting
	Help??	Mussolinu is widely credited for "making trains run on time" Even if it's not necessary true.
	First post here, hope this isn't a repost.	Hi, Peter's spunk here. A known robbery tactic on quiet rural roads is to place obstacles in the way, causing motorists to stop, and get out of their car. At this point the robbers will come out of the bushes in a group and mug you at knife / gunpoint, steal your car, and possibly murder you, all far away from help and civilisation. The esteemed Gentleman known under the alias "Fax Machine"describes a response to this situation that would make him the ideal target for this kind of robbery. He would indeed perish. So if you're ever driving at night in a quiet place and see obstacles that might be deliberately placed on the road, either plow through them if it's safe, make sure your doors are locked, reverse away from the situation and turn around at the earliest safe opportunity. Peter's spunk wishes you stay safe out there. Signing out!!
	What happens at 7.30, Peter?	This is very close to a forest. As forest goes, after dark the nocturnal animals and critters come out and make noises. And some nocturnal animals aren’t friendly
	Did something happen?	I somehow have the gif ver of the Jack Horner https://i.redd.it/6n0eafm9oyfd1.gif Edit: Nahhh this comment is the one that got 3k cuz i posted a globe of \[Nuh-uh\]???? 💀

Petah Parkuh , help

People expect anti-depressants to make them happy, but often what happens is the person feels no strong emotions at all. Or at least it seems that way after you've been having powerful mood swings for years. Depends on the underlying condition and the drugs used, but I've often heard it described as a "flattening" effect.

Friend sent me this immediately after I told him I was colorblind. All I see are dots. Petaaaah?

It doesn’t say anything don’t worry about it.

Can someone explain this

[deleted]

Petah, what's wrong here?

That is a comedian. She has a series where she interviews people who are real-life experts, and asks the most ridiculously stupid questions. The character’s name is Philemena Cunk, I think.you should search YouTube for some videos of hers. It is a joke about how everyone in the cabinet has been the worst-possible choice for their positions in the US.

Peter help

Phthalo green if anyone is looking

Petah?

The fade and an actually groomed beard are regarded as the type of hairstyles used by Caucasian males to indicate they would like to have relations with women of African descent.

Petah??

Patients who are within minutes or hours of dying often feel much better and become lucid. Family members often see this as promising, but someone around so much death knows what's coming.

I feel weird not getting this

I can't stand a lil dick no car no house no money clown ass gay ass fuck n****

??

I'm guessing they are young computer nerds and she is a hot girl. So a little flirting with them might convince them to give her sensitive info about the company. In the most extreme case passwords to infiltrate the whole computer system and take over the company ( given this is a joke).

Petah

Peter's left sock here. As a general rule, if someone has one crazy ex, the ex was probably crazy. If they describe every single ex as crazy, they are probably the one that's crazy. The doge in the middle is proud to be the first "nice guy" she's ever dated, but the one's around him know he's doomed to become another crazy ex, because the problem in all his new girlfriends past relationships was probably her. They know they can't do anything about it, because he has to learn for himself. Hope this helps, Peter's left sock out!

what’s the context?

Those prefixes are Latin for the aforementioned numbers 7-10, which were, in fact, those numbered months once. It was changed in the Julian calendar, by Julius Caesar who pretty famously got stabbed. Like a bunch.

Disney+?

So a woman died on Disney property after eating a dinner that she was assured was allergen free. Her husband sued. Disney said that when he signed up for a free one month trial of D plus he agreed to arbitration and couldn't sue.

How did they lose their career?

Because Eminem writes the most brutal, career ending disses against everyone who does

Let's see you explain this one Peter

They did shitposting back in 4500-1900BC

Petah…

The United Health Care CEO shooter was recently apprehended in Pennsylvania in a McDonald’s after a tip was called in by another customer, contrary to the current belief that it was an employee. The meme is implying that the McDonald’s worker would also snitch on Anne Frank, who was hiding in an attic from the Nazis, because of the belief a McDonald’s employee snitched

Huh?

Is it imperative that the cylinder stays unharmed?? If not you could just hammer it to break the plastic

Petre, why the two broken nails?

Trimmed for fingering safely

?

Drywall vs WALL🧱

Married zoomer here, what are we doing wrong?

Speaking as a millennial who is single, I feel like the guy on the ground watching that chopper fly off into the sunset. Dating apps are poison for anyone who isn't conventionally attractive, even if they do lead to relationships occasionally (I have a friend who met their spouse on there but they're both ridiculously attractive people inside and out) they're built with the intention of keeping people *on* the apps. That's not going to happen if they're good at pairing people off into relationships. Add in a chronically online culture exacerbated by Covid lockdowns and a cost of living crisis pushing up the price of going out for a few drinks and you have a population of people who hardly ever go out so are less likely to meet organically and less able to interact with people in a flirty way. And I include myself in this.

Help.

Roman Petrus here. The show being referenced is the mockumentary Cunk on Earth, where the titular narrator humorously misinterprets history. The Romans left a lot from their history, including pottery fragments (which broke due to the long time period), which Cunk humorously says is caused by their clumsiness.

⁉️

Canadians have legal euthanasia Britols need to wait before getting medicine Amercanus have to pay

Peter? What???

Kenneth D. Pinyin was a Boeing engineer who lived in Washington state and repeatedly filmed himself performing sex acts on horses, until he [ruptured his colon while taking a horse dick up his ass and died](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Enumclaw_horse_sex_case)

Excuse me?

There was a clip of him and P Diddy from years ago. So likely he was a member of those freak out parties that everyone including Homeland Security is concerned about leading people to think he was groomed by him, or worse.

Help me peter

https://i.redd.it/w0di7ks0a2te1.gif It's a scene from breaking bad, where walter white(dad) throws pizza on the house

Peter, what's going on in serbia?

A new sonic weapon was unveiled in Serbia against protestors. So, the problem is that it is going to be a new "non-lethal" weapon. Non-lethal weapons have the problem of making people at home feel okay about it while causing severe problems to people it's used on. Sonic weapons and stun grenades absolutely fucking deafen you and pierce your eardrums. Rubber bullets will still break bones, and can **totally** kill you, they're just less likely to kill you. Tear gas causes severe respiratory distress. As a guy whose seen stun grenades used, I'd kinda prefer if they just fired over protestors' heads or something. My ears haven't stopped ringing since I was 13. I can't sleep without a cocktail of medicine. Sonic weapons, as far as I know, can't be defended against deafening you by wearing earpro. The equivalent amount of sound is multiple .45 ACP rounds going off ***inside of you,*** radiating throughout your body.

Petah?

Autistic people have safe foods that are comforting. A lot of those are things that we grew up eating. That makes the foods familiar and therefore "safe".

petaah...

Nurses keep the death count low but the body count high

Petah… I don’t get it

Engineers are paid for efficient and low cost solutions while architects are paid to (in the best of cases but not all) make structures that look good and serve their purpose often increasing the price of and decreasing the efficiency of construction. In this image the engineers solution is practical and efficient while the architects is better looking but is less practical. This is a generalization to better answer the joke Edit: this comment ignores the fact that architects and engineers often work hand in hand using both of their strengths. Practical doesn’t always mean beautiful, and we do benefit from beauty around us.

Eh?

Civics Peter here -- some people make their own paths. The city at first is adding things to the park to try and discourage people from cutting across from the corner, but it doesn't work. Then, they give in and put in a path reflecting what people were doing originally. People still cut the (new) corner, because people are like that.

Petah

It’s a scene from The Mist. Towards the end of the film, the man pictured is held up in a car with a number of others, including his son. Believing that soon they’ll all die, he kills them all, but doesn’t have a bullet for himself. After killing them, the mist begins to clear and the military starts driving through. The tragedy is that if he had waited just a few more moments, he wouldn’t have had to kill his son. Now he has to live with it for the rest of his life.

peter help

In There Will Be Blood, the character of Daniel Plainview, a cruel and ruthless oil baron uses people around him to appear to be a sympathetic and trustworthy person. At times it was his brother until he outgrew his usefulness. For much of the movie it’s his adopted son who he only adopts because he sees the son as having a business advantage. Everything Daniel does is targeted and aimed at his business ventures, regardless of the human cost. Edit:spelling Also- many people disagree with my analysis being too simplistic. Guys, it’s just a meme. Edit 2: As now this is my top voted comment probably of all time over like 5 usernames, I’m just going to go ahead and make another statement that guys, it’s just a simplistic joke that Musk is using children to appear less sociopathic. The nuances of Daniel’s character are far more interesting that Musk’s, who was simply born rich and for his entire life has put up a charade of acting scrappy and entrepreneurial while the whole time simply being a billionaire playboy who clearly never has done any hard work. His doughy physique is a metaphor for the rest of him, he just isn’t a very dedicated, smart or disciplined person however is quick to throw a buck down to make himself appear more attractive with a hair transplant, or smarter by buying a motor company with smart engineers. So look, I’ve turned off replies, I really don’t care anymore, at least you could say there was a time when Daniel had a scrappy determination to become wealthy and made personal risks to his life and put in hard work. The film has a narrative of him with a duality of still thinking he’s the man at the bottom of the mine despite being on top of an oil company, far removed from the labor…. It’s just one of the many intricacies of the character they set up.

Petah

This guy made [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/zdv5gv/how_would_you_get_a_small_cylinder_51in_length/) on /r/askreddit. He was asking how to get a "cylinder" unstuck from a Mini M&Ms tube. The commenters realized it was his dick and ran with it, despite him repeatedly exclaiming "It's a cylinder" as if that makes it *not* his dick.

Help me out here

I’m guessing all they are assembling a team of billionaire “assassins” as these are all things that took billionaires out. Tbh idk someone let me know

petah what's the joke

There is a trend of women switching roles and saying phrases a male might say to a female: “I would’ve been in the NFL if it wasn’t for my career ending knee injury”.

Petuh?

I think this is a reference to the idea that AI can act in unpredictably (and perhaps dangerously) efficient ways. An example I heard once was if we were to ask AI to solve climate change and it proposes killing all humans. That’s hyperbolic, but you get the idea.

What did I miss in history class?

Some people defending Elon’s gesture at the inauguration claimed it was a Roman salute. Now people are mad at Elon and vandalizing Teslas, seemingly owned by random people, and this meme is jokingly making the same dumb excuse.

Pea tuh! I don't get it

Pete Davidson boned Kim Kardashian after she dumped Kanye. Pete is apparently a preferred bounce back lay for a lot of famous women because he's got mental health issues that make him not seek commitment to go along with his rumored to be huge dick. So if Bianca also boinked him, it would be funny in a sad kind of way.

Im so lost.

American soldier impregnated Vietnamese lady and left.

Peter please help

Bras for larger breasts are harder to open

Someone help me out.

The first bottle had cocaine in it.

What

The theory is that humans' hunting strategy was not to be faster or bigger than prey but just to have more stamina. So we caught our food by tiring it out, we're physically not fast or strong enough to do it any other way.

What does the number mean?

256 is 2^(8) and the fact computer use bits (0 or 1, so 2 numbers) and bytes (8 bits) is pretty basic computer knowledge. One byte can represent 256 numbers, usually 0-255. Writing tech articles without knowing that indicates they're writing on a topic they don't understand even the basics of.

What?

Catholics are supposed to give up eating meat on Fridays in lent. But fish is free game. In one region of the world a type of larg rodent, I believe its called a nutria was over populated and running rampant, so the local catholic population asked permission to eat them on fridays in lent. and the bishops were like "Ehhhh sure, well just say its a fish." And thus the nutria became a fish. Edit: I have now been told probably around 100 times that the picture is in fact a capybara, not a nutria.

I dont get it.

Wives/Girlfriends always want you to give an estimate of when you will be home from things, even if there is absolutely no way of knowing when that will be (i.e. a battle)

Pole vaulter?

https://preview.redd.it/…ole hard enough.

Peter I need help

Men for men for bear. Plate is basically saying gay men looking for a large manly man

I’m not sure about this one, Peter-san.

It’s a meme that women find men unattractive if they display any emotion, especially negative emotions like fear or sadness

Petah what did i miss?

The only upside to that debate is that people suddenly got a wake-up call as to why old out of touch people shouldn't be leading the country. Sadly, I expect most people will just hit the snooze button.

Peter? Why should they mine bitcoin?

Mining bitcoin takes a lot of electricity.

Petah, what's wrong with the cow?

Farmhand Peter here. You do not get between a mother and her calf, she will royally fuck you up.

Peter?

Napoleon is too freaky, he like that shit musty

What does the bottom image mean?

To Kill a Mockingbird Story: In 1932 Alabama, a widowed lawyer with two small children defends a black man accused of raping a white woman.

Please explain!

He’s surprised that Sheldon, a nerd, has a girlfriend. The girlfriend was excited to meet him. The fact that she knew who he was, shows she’s a nerd too, which is why it makes sense that Sheldon got a girlfriend. Edit: He is “Professor Proton” who was a former children’s science show host on Big Bang Theory.

I ain’t catholic, Pete.

The comic is saying that atheists behave in accordance with Jesus' teachings despite their lack of faith in religion or God while Christian Nationalists, whose beliefs and identity are fiercely Christian, act for the benefit of capitalism and directly contradict those same teachings. The point of it is to show the irony that atheists behave as a good Christian should while those seeking to build a Christian society do the opposite.

What does this mean Peter

Pocahontas was def inspired by psychedelics.

I don't get it petahh

There's no shame in scientists owning up to the fact that their mathematical model of the universe doesn't match reality. They made a bunch of observations that indicate their current models are incorrect. They add placeholder 'dark' factors to the equations to reflect this observed innacuracy. And then they get to work figuring out what the heck the true model of the universe is. That's science baby.

Petah?

The backrooms are a fictional location of infinite rooms that you supposedly access by glitching yourself or being glitched out of reality. The rooms are liminal spaces, spaces that are eerily empty and are portrayed with featureless carpets, white walls, and older fluorescent lighting. If there is something inside of a backroom that seems innocent, like a soda machine, chances are it's some kind of eldrich horror trying to lure you in. More than likely, it's not a coincidence our thirsty protagonist ran into a pepsi machine.

Pete??

Lily Phillips is a pornstar who wants to fuck 1,000 dudes in one day.

Saw this on twitter, what does it mean?

Guy at the bottom is flipping incredible at looking at an image and being able to pinpoint where it is on the globe with unerring accuracy. Cousin giving smouldering look sounds like Alabama. So guy identifies picture was taken in Alabama.

Comments weren't helpful

My guess is all the LED lights that gen Z’s like to have in their rooms

Muslim peter, i need help

You’re not “allowed” to depict the prophet, so there are no statues

I don't get it, can someone explain?

he wants to shape the world according to his own liking.

Petahh what did steam do?

https://preview.redd.it/…25ff99ab9ebc39a0

Petah?

https://preview.redd.it/…2e0f74f593940ca5

Peteros, what happened on Instagram on February 26th?

instas algorithm yesterday suddenly started showing straight up gore, plus nsfw stuff like videos of child birthing. and it seemed like everyone was getting it, there was also A LOT of fight videos more than normal. to say the least it wasnt fun scrolling reels yesterday. idk why it happened but i heard some of the people that filtered content in meta left and it was left for ai Edit: forgot to mention all the reels about deep sea fish apearing on shores, a lot of people seemed to get that aswell

Petah, Please Help

Be ready to be manipulated, stomped on and heart broken. Or as you know. Wednesday

Help Peter

There is no snow on that roof because it is significantly warmer than the neighbouring houses. The joke is that in 2018, the most likely explanation is someone growing weed under hot, hot grow lamps. In 2020, it's more likely to be someone running 100s of video cards to mine Bitcoin or similar (also very hot). But in 2022, power prices are so fucking high, only a lottery winner could afford to have a house that warm.

What am i looking at?

A succulent Chinese meal

Peter?

I’m a high school teacher who has this meme framed on my desk. I don’t tell the students but it’s actually for me and not for them.

Petah, what’s going on?

Topology(hole science) joke. Socks, by topological standarts, have no holes.

PETAH!?!?

When a horse breaks it's leg, it almost never heals properly, and they are often put down to save them a life of pain and repeat broken bones. The comic is ~~paralleging~~ paralleling a paper cut to a broken leg. RIP Eddie.

What happens in the nail salon petah?

Nail artists are usually foreigners that talk about customers in their mother language so they can speak badly about customers in their faces (stereotypes)

Peter, I'm so lost

After being in that chamber for a while you'll start having hallucinations. That commenter thinks that will make things much more fun.

Petah???

Disclaimer: I am a big dumb ignoramus about guns. There is a meme that one can convert an AR-15 (civilian, semi-automatic) into an automatic weapon using a cost hanger. Kermit has one on his back in the meme. I tried to look up a video to see if it's more than just a meme, and now I'm probably on a list.

Petahhh what's he holding??

Dude has the remote control for a pleasure device worn by woman who is overcome with sensation and leaning on the wall. *Choose Your Adventure, episode 37* But when I pleasure myself in public, I am asked to pull up my pants and... 1. leave the petting zoo 2. return my shopping cart to the corral 3. exit the funeral home as quietly as possible

I don’t get it. Help me Patah

That is Johnny Sins. He was a pornstar that would play characters from numerous professions. One of my favorites is where A random Twitter user tricked the Minnesota Vikings into displaying him on the big screen during Salute to Service. https://preview.redd.it/j0gedi5bpn3e1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dbca83af8170ad1c6f634f53b90e7a424c95c480

Peter, what's this about "making sense"?

My guess is, person has a dysfunctional, toxic family and thought that such a thing was normal, until they met girlfriend's parents and learned what a healthy family actually looks like

I don’t get it?

Brian here. They're saying the grandchild of these legendary people is probably such an amazing person, they may as well be the messiah. And no, I'm not the messiah. Wrong Brian.

Peter?

Alt/Goth girls are commonly referred to as “girls who will ruin your life”.

Peter, what did I miss?

Senator Mark Kelly, a possible pick for Kamala Harris to announce as her running mate and potential future Vice President, is a former astronaut who spent a total of 54 days in space. JD Vance, Donald Trump’s current running mate and potential future vice president, is currently the subject of a false social media claim/joke that he wrote in his memoir that he fucked a couch once. Whatever his flaws as a person, writing this in his memoir does not appear to be one of them.

Petah?

It's about the whole alpha, beta, delta, sigma bs that some men obsesse over it.

Peter? I’ve seen this several times but still don’t understand.

At Starbucks the sizes for drinks are not “small, medium, large.” They’re tall, grande, venti, trenta (smallest to largest). Dude was up next to order and didn’t know how to say he wanted the equivalent of a “small” drink. Starbucks baristas will typically correct you or verify the size with the correct terminology if you try to order a “small.”

Need some help for this one

Twitter Brian here If I had to make an educated guess I’m assuming that “The Sheep and the Wolf” is an analogy for politics, as the mother’s thousand yard stare implies something that the child isn’t aware of — even though the child is situationally aware/smart enough to question the realism of the stories logistics. “Everybody knows I don’t eat sheep, in fact I eat way less sheep than anybody” as he chomps down on a sheep — politicians will claim things with pure intentions while their gross actions prove otherwise — “sheep” is a commonly used word to describe naive followers, often used by conspiracy theorists to describe people who will believe anything that the media/politicians say. The third panel shows this naivety, as the sheep confidently says the sheep-eating wolf will protect them from sheep eaters. In the final panel, the daughter is incredibly skeptical, like “oh come on, nobody is that dumb”, whereas the mother knows that there are people who are *that* dumb Edited for mobile formatting

I’m stumped

The one on the top right killed his son’s rapist. Searched up Gary Plauché.

Peter? I don't have a dog

The joke is just that the dog is getting ready to run away very fast. If they do this run away instead of towards them, they will instinctively start chasing you instead of fleeing from you, making it much easier to catch them.

Do they hate it that much?

Only 3% of Latinos view the term Latinx positively. It is largely an insult to their language and by proxy, their culture.

Peter????

See now a redditor not getting this one i get

Why is he sweating?

Well, my wife went to get the car checked alone, we spend a lot on small repairs, that i had checked by a mechanic i trust and all of them where either unessecary or he wasnt sure they even did it I drive in there alone with my rustbucket and they go, naah, part is still fine, heres your TÜV.

Peter?

trump

Petahhh….

https://preview.redd.it/…riginal incident

Why?

I’m guessing they don’t want giant, floppy horse cocks on screen for some crazy reason.

I feel like this is going to be really bad peter

Peter's Dark Arts Teacher here. JK Rowling is infamous for making some rather on-the-nose names, like naming a werewolf "Lupin" which means wolf.

What's wrong with chocolate peter

A lot of chocolate is produced by child slave labor with major suppliers often claiming to be "shocked" whenever it gets uncovered but really it's just expensive and moderately difficult to fully root out so they just don't really try that hard. The meme is mocking vegans for going out of their way to protect bees while not being too worried about *human slaves*

Petah, what's the reason behind this sign?

iirc, the girl was shadow's friend and her death was important for shadows origin and people cheered because he truly became "shadow the hedgehog" and got a motive when she died. sorry, english is not my first language

Petah I'm not from the US

Basically the setting of FarCry 5

Peter?

I see my parents fighting

Help??

Mussolinu is widely credited for "making trains run on time" Even if it's not necessary true.

First post here, hope this isn't a repost.

Hi, Peter's spunk here. A known robbery tactic on quiet rural roads is to place obstacles in the way, causing motorists to stop, and get out of their car. At this point the robbers will come out of the bushes in a group and mug you at knife / gunpoint, steal your car, and possibly murder you, all far away from help and civilisation. The esteemed Gentleman known under the alias "Fax Machine"describes a response to this situation that would make him the ideal target for this kind of robbery. He would indeed perish. So if you're ever driving at night in a quiet place and see obstacles that might be deliberately placed on the road, either plow through them if it's safe, make sure your doors are locked, reverse away from the situation and turn around at the earliest safe opportunity. Peter's spunk wishes you stay safe out there. Signing out!!

What happens at 7.30, Peter?

This is very close to a forest. As forest goes, after dark the nocturnal animals and critters come out and make noises. And some nocturnal animals aren’t friendly

Did something happen?

I somehow have the gif ver of the Jack Horner https://i.redd.it/6n0eafm9oyfd1.gif Edit: Nahhh this comment is the one that got 3k cuz i posted a globe of \[Nuh-uh\]???? 💀